The roots of a criminal : A FTL Fan-Fiction

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stylesrj
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Re: The roots of a criminal : A FTL Fan-Fiction

Postby stylesrj » Mon Dec 07, 2015 11:40 pm

I take it that Mantis Captain gives a crap about who owns the Basilisk rather than shouting "Your ship will make a mighty fine prize!"

Also, that's a bit too much exposition for a Mantis and considering chapter length, we don't need the recap on how that ship came into his possession nor should he tell everyone he meets how he got it. Imagine if Batman shouted "My parents were murdered by a criminal and so I spent many years training in martial arts and developing a persona of bats just so I can deal justice to punks like you on the streets!" every time he got into a fight?

"Return the stolen cruiser!" "Make me! I bet you fight like an Engi!" sounds less awkward and more fighty.

Lastly, the ending makes me think *announcer voice* does Kazaaak:

1) Kill the Humans!
2) Recruit the Humans
or
3) Recheck his paperwork!

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