FTL Towel Boy for Hire

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agigabyte
Posts: 551
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Re: FTL Towel Boy for Hire

Postby agigabyte » Fri Jan 16, 2015 2:29 am

Your talent for well constructed lies is simply astounding.
Tharsis
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Re: FTL Towel Boy for Hire

Postby Tharsis » Fri Jan 16, 2015 6:18 am

The Engi Brigade calculates a 1.5% chance that the Mantis are behind any of the transmittions. To put you at ease, I would like to assure you we are not being placed in any danger by said Mantis and we are helping you purely out of free will. Out calculation was 100% accurate.

Sincerely
10011011110100100101101101
"The're coming to destroy us... Why?... We want peace..."
The Dark Ones
agigabyte
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Re: FTL Towel Boy for Hire

Postby agigabyte » Fri Jan 16, 2015 6:21 am

That is even worse. :cry:
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stylesrj
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Re: FTL Towel Boy for Hire

Postby stylesrj » Fri Jan 16, 2015 6:47 am

See meatsack, even the Engies believe that the mantis are not behind this. We are totally Federation Command and this is Admiral Tolly. Now, will you serve upon the Basilisk and help with our towel problems?

((I don't think the OP is ever coming back but still, this is all hilarious as we all fight over this one guy for towel duty :lol: ))
agigabyte
Posts: 551
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Re: FTL Towel Boy for Hire

Postby agigabyte » Fri Jan 16, 2015 6:50 am

((Is this part of the Engi Conspiracy 'Verse now?))


And we just freed the Engi with a commando raid.
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stylesrj
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Re: FTL Towel Boy for Hire

Postby stylesrj » Fri Jan 16, 2015 7:03 am

((I hope it's not))

Dear Foolish Meatsack Towelboy,

Meatsack, we just got word that the Engies calculations are 100% wrong. If you go with those sacks of computers, they will capture and enslave you.
Federation Command is being very generous. You should know because I am Admirable Tollo and I am always for you foolish meatsacks.

Regards,
Still totally Federation Command. Not Mantises and definitely not Engies looking to enslave you. Join us for dinner already!
Tharsis
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Re: FTL Towel Boy for Hire

Postby Tharsis » Fri Jan 16, 2015 3:19 pm

((The Engi Conspiracy died, and this is not part of it))

Mission: acquire towel boy

Status: incomplete

We are a different group of Engies looking for a towel boy (in the background "that meatsack will surely fall to this plan" is heard faintly) we pay well and have good living conditions. We are not being pressured by mantises or anything, so come over to Engi Controlled Sector 6 long range "exit" jump beacon. Thank you for your cooperation ("foolish meatsack" is heard again faintly).

Thank you for considering us
111100001111000011110000
"The're coming to destroy us... Why?... We want peace..."
The Dark Ones
agigabyte
Posts: 551
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Re: FTL Towel Boy for Hire

Postby agigabyte » Fri Jan 16, 2015 3:46 pm

((I just wondered because Dire is in.))

Damnit. Looks like he left while he could. Makes sense after seeing our responses.
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DarkPhoenix141
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Re: FTL Towel Boy for Hire

Postby DarkPhoenix141 » Fri Jan 16, 2015 7:37 pm

This continues to seem legit.
This is no easy mission...

BUT YOU SON. YOU WERE BORN FOR IT.

And remember:

GODS WILL BE WATCHING
agigabyte
Posts: 551
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Re: FTL Towel Boy for Hire

Postby agigabyte » Fri Jan 16, 2015 7:43 pm

Also, Mantis person, we can hear you in the background.

Where did you get all those Engi from?

(The thread itself is dead but Phoenix and I are doing fics set in the ECV)

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