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Re: Dumb ways to die!

Posted: Sat Nov 22, 2014 8:44 pm
by SelphieSelfie
I'm surprised no one has posted this yet. Happened to me about 3 times now.

*Rips through enemies.
*Forgets to turn Oxygen back on.

Re: Dumb ways to die!

Posted: Tue Dec 16, 2014 6:47 pm
by Tojin
Engi Type B.

So I ended up fighting the ASB due to some poor planning, and got out alive, but severely damaged. Jumped to the exit, went to a civilian sector. First jump, I get an automated scout with no shields. I think, "OK, no problem".

Then it hacks my weapons.

Game over.

Re: Dumb ways to die!

Posted: Thu Jan 29, 2015 9:19 pm
by erumsey
This is the dumbest way the rebel flagship died. Here's its perspective
HA! The USS tetragon? This should be EASY!
Uhhh captian. This tetragon has a
CHARGE THE EVERYTHING CREW! But uhh sir
I SAID CHARGE THE EVERYTHING!
SIR! This ship has a Vulcan on it!
Wait... What
*tetragon warps in*
*me* say hello to my little friend
Pew
EVERYBODY RUUUUUUUNNNNNNNN
Pew pew
AHHHHHHHHHHH
*death star music plays*
Starts Pewing at full potential
AUHHHHHH
*blows up first stage flagship*
This is what the gunner at the lasers was saying at stage3
Please kill with death blossom please kill with death blossom PLEASE KILL WITH DEATH BLOSSOM
Pew pew pew pew pew
HES NOT DEAD AHHHHHHH
*rebel flagship blows up*
Yeah they made a big mistake. A very big one.
THE END

Re: Dumb ways to die!

Posted: Wed Feb 11, 2015 10:49 pm
by stylesrj
Huh, in my case the Rebel Flagship would be like this:

Rebel Officer: A Vulcan? Pah that's a stupid weapon. Just drop a Hacking Drone on the Weapons and call it a day.
Gunner: Ummm sir, they've shot it down.
Officer: Launch another one then Johnson!
Gunner: Hey it got through and disabled their drones! Must be the Basilisk.
Officer: Also, we're cloaked and have missiles. Let's keep hitting their Weapons with them and setting them on fire.

On the Basilisk:
Mantis: Gah how do I fix this thing again? Where's the Engi?
Engi: Beep boop. I'm in the Clone Bay. You broke it in the last battle and caused a hull breach. The DNA bank is keeping me intact.
Mantis: Gah! How can we board this foolish meatsack ship at low health?

Re: Dumb ways to die!

Posted: Tue Feb 24, 2015 3:28 am
by dark33hawk
Yep...that's like every other play with that ship.

Re: Dumb ways to die!

Posted: Wed Mar 18, 2015 9:34 pm
by LambdaProject
Stealth A, oxygen was down in Last Stand. Sent (read: sacrificed) 2 humans to repair oxygen. I usually power down anything to the left of oxygen. Unfortunately that was med bay.











I didn't understand what happened until i ragequitted and started playing Half Life: Episode 2

Re: Dumb ways to die!

Posted: Thu Apr 02, 2015 1:52 pm
by Hubnester
Another run with The Nesasio. Sector 5 or 6, good Shields and Engines, upgraded hacking, fair weapons rack (though in retrospect, it wouldn't stand a bat's chance in hell against the Flagship), though a crew of five humans and two engi (I think).

So I get pit against a Mantis ship, and get boarded. Do the usual, venting, the herding them to a room. Meanwhile, I hack enemy shields, and tunnel-vision on it, focusing on seeing my weapons tear shit up.

Then my eyes pan back to my ship. I FORGOT TO CLOSE THE AIRLOCKS! The next thing I see, four of them fleshy human meatsacks are dead, one of them dying just as I noticed what happened.

And thus a run ended because I got tunnel-vision. After a few jumps aimlessly wandering around, I finally kill off my remaining crew by turning off shields and engines, venting the whole ship, and waiting for the enemy to kill me (though I liked to think of that as the remaining human gone insane. I'm sure there's some story potential in this...)

This was even worse than the three or so times I tried suffocating boarders, only to have them destroy my doors.

Aaand I forgot to introduce myself. Sorry. The name's Hubnester, I like FTL and necroing posts, and have a whole idea for a story/sequel just waiting to be made/written.

Re: Dumb ways to die!

Posted: Tue Apr 14, 2015 8:13 pm
by Jgoodste
Mantis B, Sector 1: I board an enemy ship with my starting mantis crew, leaving no one behind on board. I don't remember which ship it was, I think it was a Pirate-Rebel Fighter or something like that. Anyway, I killed off the crew of a Rock and a Human and waited for the end dialogue to show up. As I was doing this, I realized that I forgot to activate my Defense Drone Mk.1. The enemy had a Leto missile launcher that took out my teleporter. As I was waiting, I notice that my mantis boarders have begun to fight again. They are both at just below 1/2 health. I look around, and somehow, I missed the fact that the enemy had a Clonebay and I never took it out (I didn't teleport in there). The next thing you know, my critical mantis boarders are facing a cloned Rock and Human, and they have no chance, being unable to teleport back with the TP broken and no one back on my ship to fix it. Can't really blame the RNG for that one...

Re: Dumb ways to die!

Posted: Tue Sep 22, 2015 9:57 pm
by (totally assigned)
Sector 1: Jump 1
Ship: Engi B
Cause of Death: Pirate
Why: The pirate had a anti drone drone.My only reliable way of hurting him was through that drone... I just helplessly kept sending ion shots over there,hoping one would hit the drone.

Re: Dumb ways to die!

Posted: Fri Oct 23, 2015 10:58 am
by Pyrociraptor
Engi B, Sector 1.
Refueling Station, accidentally pressed "dock with it".
Well, fudge.

Cruiser A, Against Rebel flagship (3th battle time.)
Accidentally lowered shield instead of medbay during the power surge.
That thing had 1 hp left. 1 HP. LEFT.